In Loving Memory
If there's a person I dearly miss, it'd be the man who lived in our British styled government quarters for some time during his bachelor days. Appa's good friend, I used to call him Uncle Doctor.Up till I was about 10 I believed that was his first name,Doctor.
He took the room right at the back, and I remember my grandmother not being happy, because my parents were considered newly-weds and it wouldn't look nice, him living with us.
I used to peer through the windows every evening, waiting to see him walk down that small hill home from the hospital.
I was his little angel, his precious..that's what he used to call me. whenever I got in trouble with my folks, he took my side. Whenever I hurt myself,he'd sit me on his lap and dab the grazes and wounds with ointments from our first aid box.I remember staying up late during the days that he was 'on call' and missing him terribly whenever he 'balik-ed kampung'. Only he could pacify me from wailing like an unruly gremlin, and make me eat the disgusting phlegm-like porridge my mum used to try shoving down my throat.
On the day he got married, I sat on his lap during the entire lunch at the temple and was in practically every possible picture. The wedding reception was in our house, and I felt very important because Harpreet and I were elected (more like, self-appointed) to be the 'flowergirls'. We joined hands with the new couple when they cut their cake, after feeding his bride, he leant over and fed me my favourite part, the icing flowers of the cake. Yes, I was spoilt. Couldn't help being an adorable kid...
He moved out and went on to have three kids, I went through a minor depression episode for a while; that's how much I was attached to him. He did visit us regularly, but it wasn't the same coz he had his own kids to tend to and pamper. Felt a lil jealousy creeping in..but they were really nice kids, though the son was much of a terror...
They all had Russian names that he fell in love with while he did his medical degree in Russia.
Uncle Doctor loved spicy food, he taught me how to appreciate the same. He could like, munch on an entire cili padi,just like that..and me being a spicy food-virgin at that time used to be pretty amazed, and thought the world of him coz of that.
Soon he began to realise that he couldn't hold much pedas-ness anymore, it gave him bad tummy aches and caused serious pains. After many trips to the hospital, each doctor-friend of his dismissing it as 'somthing that was probably nothing', he performed a few tests on himself and finally diagonsed himself with colon cancer.
It had been a good number of years since I saw him (we moved to Klang,he to KKB), when my dad told me to get myself ready, we were to go to visit him. My parents refused to disclose the reason of his admittance, said they didn't know themselves.
What I saw when I entered that cold, sombre room of his will forever be etched in my mind. Lying there, he was motionless and could afford only a smile. That smile that made me a happy child. That smile he used to flash when I paraded my new frocks to him. I was by his side only for a while, but long enough for him to tell me that I'd grown, and how much he missed me, and what a darling child I was. I remember his son walking in; he smiled and greeted us politely, that former terror.
Uncle doctor said that he'd changed tremendously upon leaning about his dad's sickness,upon learning that him,being the only son, had to somewhat 'grow up' faster and take care of the others.I had to excuse myself to welcome the overwhelming emotions.
My parents went on to visit him a couple of times after that, and I'd refuse to follow, being selfish and only thinking about the pain I'd feel seeing him helpless. I forgot that the man who put everything and everyone before him felt it many times over, and in infinite plentifolds.
I wasn't allowed to go for the funeral service, only the prayers, days after.
Surreal, that was what it was. One moment you see life, the next you see it slowly crawling away, taking with it dreams and hopes, leaving uncertainties and needless pain.
Its been about 8 or 9 years since..and I still miss his tremendously...
He took the room right at the back, and I remember my grandmother not being happy, because my parents were considered newly-weds and it wouldn't look nice, him living with us.
I used to peer through the windows every evening, waiting to see him walk down that small hill home from the hospital.
I was his little angel, his precious..that's what he used to call me. whenever I got in trouble with my folks, he took my side. Whenever I hurt myself,he'd sit me on his lap and dab the grazes and wounds with ointments from our first aid box.I remember staying up late during the days that he was 'on call' and missing him terribly whenever he 'balik-ed kampung'. Only he could pacify me from wailing like an unruly gremlin, and make me eat the disgusting phlegm-like porridge my mum used to try shoving down my throat.
On the day he got married, I sat on his lap during the entire lunch at the temple and was in practically every possible picture. The wedding reception was in our house, and I felt very important because Harpreet and I were elected (more like, self-appointed) to be the 'flowergirls'. We joined hands with the new couple when they cut their cake, after feeding his bride, he leant over and fed me my favourite part, the icing flowers of the cake. Yes, I was spoilt. Couldn't help being an adorable kid...
He moved out and went on to have three kids, I went through a minor depression episode for a while; that's how much I was attached to him. He did visit us regularly, but it wasn't the same coz he had his own kids to tend to and pamper. Felt a lil jealousy creeping in..but they were really nice kids, though the son was much of a terror...
They all had Russian names that he fell in love with while he did his medical degree in Russia.
Uncle Doctor loved spicy food, he taught me how to appreciate the same. He could like, munch on an entire cili padi,just like that..and me being a spicy food-virgin at that time used to be pretty amazed, and thought the world of him coz of that.
Soon he began to realise that he couldn't hold much pedas-ness anymore, it gave him bad tummy aches and caused serious pains. After many trips to the hospital, each doctor-friend of his dismissing it as 'somthing that was probably nothing', he performed a few tests on himself and finally diagonsed himself with colon cancer.
It had been a good number of years since I saw him (we moved to Klang,he to KKB), when my dad told me to get myself ready, we were to go to visit him. My parents refused to disclose the reason of his admittance, said they didn't know themselves.
What I saw when I entered that cold, sombre room of his will forever be etched in my mind. Lying there, he was motionless and could afford only a smile. That smile that made me a happy child. That smile he used to flash when I paraded my new frocks to him. I was by his side only for a while, but long enough for him to tell me that I'd grown, and how much he missed me, and what a darling child I was. I remember his son walking in; he smiled and greeted us politely, that former terror.
Uncle doctor said that he'd changed tremendously upon leaning about his dad's sickness,upon learning that him,being the only son, had to somewhat 'grow up' faster and take care of the others.I had to excuse myself to welcome the overwhelming emotions.
My parents went on to visit him a couple of times after that, and I'd refuse to follow, being selfish and only thinking about the pain I'd feel seeing him helpless. I forgot that the man who put everything and everyone before him felt it many times over, and in infinite plentifolds.
I wasn't allowed to go for the funeral service, only the prayers, days after.
Surreal, that was what it was. One moment you see life, the next you see it slowly crawling away, taking with it dreams and hopes, leaving uncertainties and needless pain.
Its been about 8 or 9 years since..and I still miss his tremendously...
4 Comments:
this post brought tears to my eyes...
very touching
when you lose someone dear to unforseen conditions such as these, it'll either break you or make you stronger.
I do both..put on a strong front, despite being the total opposite sometimes...
Makes you think about the fragility of life and our mortality. All reasons to not take things for granted...friendships,family,your little pet...
you entry brought tears to my eyes..couldn't help feeling choked with my own emotions remembering my granduncle who passed away from colon cancer before christmas last year...he's happy now i suppose and not suffering anymore..probably looking down on me and tellin me to go have fun tonite! yup, i'm sitting here all dressed up waiting to head to zouk and decided to read your blog while waiting for my vain friends to get dressed!
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